I'm feeling overwhelmed by the not-knowing, the suspense of not having all of the details in place about what my life is going to look like for the next two years. I don't have--and can't make--a plan. I suppose that this is good practice for the "staying flexible" that everyone talks about needing as a fundamental skill in the Peace Corps. But to be honest it's driving me a little batty now. Everyone around me is asking questions about what I'll be doing, where I'll be working, what language I'll be speaking, etc etc etc, and the answer of "I really don't know, honestly," is getting a little old.
I realized today just how very long it's been since I started this process. My Peace Corps dental record is a year old (I went to get a cleaning, oh joy of joys, today, and updated it). Looking back at my application, I realized that I started communicating with the Peace Corps in January 2006, nearly 22 months ago. Could the process get any more drawn out?
The goodbye process has also gotten drawn out. It doesn't feel real somehow, to say farewell to someone (even to dear dear friends) a full month before leaving. I wonder when it will all sink in that I'm actually going (and for so long!). Maybe once the bags begin to get packed.
Right, and then there's that. All the packing. Recent highlights from my list of things to acquire/find/organize before I leave:
* a vegetable peeler and a sharp paring knife
* a roll of duct tape and a roll of toilet paper
* shortwave radio
* approximately nine million gallons of sunscreen (three months' worth; how much does one presume that comes to for someone as pale as I am?)
* solar powered battery charger
* small crossword and math puzzle books; travel scrabble
Some trips to Target, REI, and the thrift store are probably in order. Perhaps that will keep me occupied for a little while; it has the semblance, at least, of feeling like I'm making some kind of plan.
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